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Snow Days

check out today's post over at No Emojis!  Cards I worked on during Snow Days!

Post Today over on A Healthier Family is a Happier Family

Is this what YOUR food pyramid looks like? Click here to read my crazy story.

A Three Day Weekend....how will you spend it?

Dream Big!

As I was watching my grandson today, I was amazed at his creativity. The ingenuity of a small child is beyond amazing. Many times, when we hit an obstacle in our planning or our ideas---anything from a snag to a brick wall---we often just say, "forget it" and we move on. Often times, we are tired, we are frustrated, or we just really aren't completely committed to what we are attempting. Not so with little ones. 

I watched this precious 2 year old bundle of energy, my grandson aka "Lil Prince", as he formed a pile of pillows, rearranged them a dozen times, and moved away from them. Next, he pulled the top off of a storage ottoman only to put it right back, pulled out a large book and then put it aside, followed by a large toy, even my shoes, each being quickly pushed aside....all in an attempt to build a tunnel through which his Thomas the Train could pass while chugging along on it's little track. Nothing worked. He left the room and moments later I heard a soft scrubbing along the hall floor. Lil Prince appeared dragging a huge basket with Mega Bloks (Granddaddy Legos, I call them). He proceeded to build a tower that fit over the track and rose high above it, letting the tiny train run below and through it.  I watched his face as he built this architectural wonder. The determination and concentration so clearly expressed on that beautiful little face. Never once in all his initial attempts did he get frustrated or discouraged. Those expressions would signal when a new idea came to mind, each time one idea would fail, and as he would contemplate his next move. This little guy never ceases to amaze me. He kept at it. He did not quit. He used every resource at his disposal to achieve his goal. He finally found the right combination of resources and built that dream.

What happens to us, that we lose that sense of excitement, the drive to achieve, that determination? As we get older, we tend to throw our dreams by the wayside, toss them in an ever growing pile of To Be Filed, or put them on hold indefinitely.  Our excitement is replaced with false (begrudged) contentment, our drive morphs into dread, and our determination fizzles from frustration. Why is that? Why do perfectly normal people of every socio-economic class, race, and religious and political persuasion do that--lose sight of their dreams? Is it a loss of hope, a lack of faith? Does life present so many trials and tribulations that we just can't perceive achieving our dreams, or even coming close to a next best thing?

I read an article, *"How Far Should You Chase the Impossible Dream" in Psychology Today which was very thought-provoking.  I would be interested in your opinions. This particular article was more about overcoming or accepting physical disabilities and conditions such as Autism, than the wishful dreaming of folks who want to become a movie star, own a book store, win a Heisman, spend a year traveling, or be the next Andy Warhol. But the article could honestly refer to any kind of dreams or hopes. It addresses when to determine if you should abandon a dream or hope, when to decide if it is a waste of time.

*We all like to believe in the "impossible."  To see when people beat the odds.  But how do you choose the dreams to chase?  When is chasing the "impossible dream" foolhardy, and when is it visionary? When should you be realistic versus idealistic?  

Just like our tastes change as we grow physically and mature emotionally, why can't our dreams evolve? Just because we wanted to be the first woman POTUS when we were 15, should we consider it a sell-out when, at age 20, our desire is to become a civil rights lawyer? If we wanted to be Tom Brady when we enter college, does our later desire to be a college coach or sports medicine professional mean we have sold out our dreams? Does it mean we accepted our circumstances and threw our dreams away? I don't think so. I think it means we became more aware of the world and its needs as well as our own skills, gifts, and talents.....and we see how those things can come together to make us happy and to help others. As a teenager, I wanted to be a lawyer until I realized having to sit down and keep my mouth shut, just because a judge told me to, was not included in my skill sets, desires, or in the best interest of any prospective clients whose fate might be determined by the mindset of a judge who doesn't like smart-mouthed, rebellious attorneys. Tolerance for that behavior is only acceptable on True Believer and Eddie Dodd. I also came to realize that not every lawyer becomes a senior partner nor does every lawyer earn an upper 6-figure income allowing them to drive a Ferrari and have vacation homes. It also became evident to me that lawyers often have early hours, late nights, get called away on weekends, and sometimes have to defend the guilty and the unethical. I didn't abandon my goal. My awareness of the realities of that goal increased; my realization that I was more interested in the title than the work of a lawyer became evident as I learned more about the profession.

Do I think I am throwing my dreams away if I want to own a bookstore but instead settle for working at Walmart and hating every day of it? It depends. How long will I work at Walmart?  While I am working at Walmart, am I plotting my course, making a game plan, mapping out my future, working on a blueprint for my life as a bibliopreneur? Have I made contact with those in that profession to learn more about it? Have I made an attempt to work at a bookstore to find out just what owning a bookstore entails? Those are good test questions to determine if you have given up or if you are still working on your dream. 

*Do you hold out hope, chase the "impossible dream"?  Or do you find victory in acceptance? When does hope transcend to foolhardiness, and when does acceptance become negativity? Do we even know with certainty what is "impossible"? 

In the cases that were used as examples in this article, I think both never gave up. One was  determined to overcome his physical disabilities and return to his pre-accident abilities. He worked hard; he overcame many of the obstacles, surpassed them beyond all expectations, even though he was never able to walk again. The other example was one of someone who accepted her circumstances and her goals took her "disabilities" into consideration. I may be wrong, but in my interpretation of this article, it seemed to assign a negative or less than hopeful label to her.  That is not how I interpret her life. She did not give up. She did not give in. She did not strive to do something that professionals said she would never do. Neither did she just sit around and let life pass her by. Instead, she learned to do things in a different way. She looked at life from a different perspective. She used the resources and abilities available to her. She accomplished more through creative thinking, as a "disabled" person, than many do with less obstacles in their way.  If you want a beautiful rose bush but you live in the city with no garden, what do you do? Do you say, "oh, I live in an apartment, I can't enjoy a rose bush." Or do you buy a rose bush and a pretty pot and put it on your balcony? If you see a dress that you love but that dress only comes in a size 8 and you wear a size 14, you have 3 choices: you can just forget it, you can lose weight, or you can have one tailor-made to fit you. I like having one made just for me! It may be a little different....but it will be unique...and my own!

*The recent bestseller The Secret would have you believe that using the "Law of Attraction" anything that you can conceive can manifest. That any illness can be healed, any circumstance you don't like can be changed if you simply believe enough. These thoughts are echoed by some religious groups - that if you believe enough that God has the power to change your circumstances, he will change those circumstances.  Many secular teachers also teach similar beliefs, including the power of positive thinking. 

I believe God has the power to change any circumstances. I believe that God can heal any illness. But I also believe that no matter what my desire is, God knows better than I. I may wish to be the greatest artist in the world, and regardless of whether I am born with a natural talent or a learned one, if God's will is not for me to be the next Rembrandt, I won't be. If he has different plans for me....and I have faith in Him, then He will show me what He wants me to do. But I also believe that He will listen to me and hear what I am asking, just like He listened to Abraham's pleas for Sodom and the prayer of Jabez for blessing and protection. If His judgement is that my desires are to be fulfilled, He will show me the paths I need to take. But I must have Faith!

What are your dreams?  Have you fulfilled them? Do others think they are "impossible"? Are you biding your time while working your way toward your goal? Are you thinking out of the box, using the resources available to you, testing different routes to reach it?  Do you have faith that you can accomplish the things you set out to accomplish?

Never lose faith.  Never lose hope. Never give up on your dream.

Take Charge!

Start your planning strategy right now! Be your own boss, write that novel, compose that song, make that movie, build that house, buy that retirement home. 

What is your big dream? Is it to write a novel? Has your life been so interesting that you have a memoir inside, just waiting to be shared? Do you have a melody and the next great lyrical masterpiece floating around in your brain? Is the stage calling your name; do you see your name in lights above Broadway or your star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame? Or have you been dreaming of your own little mom and pop business, a cottage industry or brick and mortar office/shop?  What about that dream vacation, trip around the world, or the beach condo, mountain lodge, or lake house you have in mind for your retirement days? 

How to you get there? Well, gosh, I sure don't know! Hahaha! You thought I would have some great answer to that? Wrong. But I do know some steps to get there and the first few are so easy. They are the same steps to tackling any other task, problem, or goal you aim to reach.

NO DISTRACTIONS

Begin by removing all distractions. Turn your phone and all electronics off, including anything that has quick and easy access to social media! There is no need to check your messages for a while, no need to see what your BFF's latest status is, or keep up with the most recent tweets of your favorite celebrity tweeters. 

COMFORT

Find a nice quiet place, in the most ergonomic position available, in your most comfortable clothes. Personally, my idea of the perfect setting is a rocking chair, on my porch, in my favorite pajamas! And don't forget the cup of coffee, tea, or cocoa, or maybe your preference would be a glass of wine or ice cold sweet tea!

BE PREPARED

All you need is a notebook (the paper kind) and a pen. I suggest a notebook instead of your laptop or notebook (the electronic kind) because it is much too easy to fall into the temptations that social media and web browsing offer.  It is always good to have a calendar (maybe for up to 24 months) handy, too.

LIST, LIST, AND LIST AGAIN

When you are about to go on a trip, whether it is across the country, or across town, what do you do? You consult Google Maps, you grab a cup of coffee or a bottle of water, and you head out. Right? Same thing here.  Take a sip of your favorite drink and start listing all the things you want to accomplish, the goals you want to reach.  When you finish that list, make a list of the things you need to do or must do. 

AND MORE LISTS

How can you get anywhere without directions? Can you prepare a dish without a recipe? Do you go to the grocery store without a shopping list? Probably not. When you make your lists of Want To Do and Need To Do, you need to make lists within lists. Under each item on your Want and Need lists, make smaller lists of the resources or skills you need to meet each goal and the things you have to do to get there to be able to mark them off  your list.

PRIORITIZE & ORGANIZE

Now, on your map and directions, you need to know which towns come first so you know where you are and what comes next, right? Well, same thing with mapping out your goals! Take your Want list and prioritize it. The ones that are quickest and easiest to accomplish, put at the top of your list. Get them marked off! Put less miles between you and those ultimate goals! I took a Dave Ramsey course years ago. He urged Baby Steps in gaining financial security. Pay those small bills down first. It's a psychological thing as well as reality---the feeling of accomplishment and encouragement is increased every time something is achieved and marked off your list!

Okay, that's about as far as I can take you, except to say, start working on those lists. Put them where you will see them every day. Every time you can mark something off those lists and sub-lists, DO IT! 

I hope you will comment and tell me what your big goal is, what you are doing to work toward that goal, and how your journey is going!

Follow Your Dreams

Check out today's post on Photography & Events--Art & Fun!

Happy 2018!

more photos by J Mack Buie